September 23, 2007
September 4, 2007
i think i'm in a bad relationship
i had a great thought while i was taking a shower last night: being in law school is like being in a really bad relationship. i mean, the symptoms are all there - suffocation, alienation, depression, frustration, moodiness, drastic change in personality, etc. when you're in law school, you can't do anything else. you're stuck. you've lost your independence.
for example, i used to travel. i picked up and went when i wanted to. i wanted to see ireland? three months later i was there. i wanted to see new zealand? five months later i was there. but when you're in this bad relationship, all you can see in five months is the same old, same old.
you just...lose your drive for more because you're so caught up in making this relationship work through to tomorrow.
and this horrible feeling spills over into the rest of your life until you're brain tells you to be unhappy everywhere, with everyone. and though you know it's all in your head, rationality really doesn't apply anymore. and you recognize that too.
but the problem with all of these bad relationships is that you have his perpetual hope that it'll get better. you know, you just know that if you can see it through, if you can stick it out for a little while longer, things will be okay.
until then? you're kinda screwed.
in other news: fast for Haiti debt relief on thursday!
and i've got an idea for a story. that hasn't happened to me in a few years. i feel like i want to horde it, keep that idea safe, not let anything tarnish or break it. but i'll try to write it down anyway. isn't that what writers do?
for example, i used to travel. i picked up and went when i wanted to. i wanted to see ireland? three months later i was there. i wanted to see new zealand? five months later i was there. but when you're in this bad relationship, all you can see in five months is the same old, same old.
you just...lose your drive for more because you're so caught up in making this relationship work through to tomorrow.
and this horrible feeling spills over into the rest of your life until you're brain tells you to be unhappy everywhere, with everyone. and though you know it's all in your head, rationality really doesn't apply anymore. and you recognize that too.
but the problem with all of these bad relationships is that you have his perpetual hope that it'll get better. you know, you just know that if you can see it through, if you can stick it out for a little while longer, things will be okay.
until then? you're kinda screwed.
in other news: fast for Haiti debt relief on thursday!
and i've got an idea for a story. that hasn't happened to me in a few years. i feel like i want to horde it, keep that idea safe, not let anything tarnish or break it. but i'll try to write it down anyway. isn't that what writers do?
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